Plymothian

At the beginning of chapter 7 of Song of Songs the man praises the woman in the most complete and systematic fashion.  Nothing has been hidden by the woman and, physically he systematically covers the womans revealed body with kisses.  To many Christians this kind of complete sexual disclosure seems incongruous with the way that sex has been talked about in hushed tones if at all.  The truth is that God has provided a book which shows his open and affirming attitude toward a healthy sex life.  Of course, sex has been misappropriated by those in the New testament that see liberty in Christ as license to engage in all kinds of immorality that God does not condone.  However, within marriage there is a wholesome and legitimate mutual exploration that can be described as a browsing among the lilies.

Song of Songs 7:1-9

 ^{1 [a]}How beautiful your sandaled feet,
   O prince’s daughter!
Your graceful legs are like jewels,
   the work of an artist’s hands.
² Your navel is a rounded goblet
   that never lacks blended wine.
Your waist is a mound of wheat
   encircled by lilies.
³ Your breasts are like two fawns,
   like twin fawns of a gazelle.
⁴ Your neck is like an ivory tower.
Your eyes are the pools of Heshbon
   by the gate of Bath Rabbim.
Your nose is like the tower of Lebanon
   looking toward Damascus.
⁵ Your head crowns you like Mount Carmel.
   Your hair is like royal tapestry;
   the king is held captive by its tresses.
⁶ How beautiful you are and how pleasing,
   my love, with your delights!
⁷ Your stature is like that of the palm,
   and your breasts like clusters of fruit.
⁸ I said, “I will climb the palm tree;
   I will take hold of its fruit.”
May your breasts be like clusters of grapes on the vine,
   the fragrance of your breath like apples,
 ⁹ and your mouth like the best wine.

Questions

1. How does the description of the woman’s physical beauty progress?
2. Why are the breasts mentioned multiple times?
3. What is the man’s aim in describing the woman this way?
4. Within marriage what kind of bodily interrraction is agreeable?
5. When and how often should a man take time to praise his wife’s naked form?

Going Deeper

How does frequency and quality of sexual interraction vary with age and life’s responsibilities?  How do men praise women in this way without getting ‘excited’?

Putting on a show seems less necessary as couples grow more familiar with each other.  However, the imagery of Song of Songs 6 seems to imply that the woman is putting on a show for her man.  Surprisingly others seem to be aware of the woman’s dancing and the man is merely inquisitive at first.  However, like the other men who see the dance, he is excited and stirred to passionate action.  The general collection of amorous men see the woman from behind but they long for her to turn around.  However, the object of her show has arrived and this will continue with a private audience.

Song of Songs 6:11-13

   ¹¹ I went down to the grove of nut trees
   to look at the new growth in the valley,
to see if the vines had budded
   or the pomegranates were in bloom.
¹² Before I realized it,
   my desire set me among the royal chariots of my people.^[a]

   Friends

 ¹³ Come back, come back, O Shulammite;
   come back, come back, that we may gaze on you!

   He

   Why would you gaze on the Shulammite
   as on the dance of Mahanaim?

Questions

1. Why might a woman performing a public dance be attractive?
2. Why might a woman performing a public dance be permissable?
3. How might a dance change when it is performed for a lover?
4. Why do some churches ban ‘social dancing’?
5. How would you dance for your lover to entertain them?

The beauty of Song of Songs is noticed in the details.  The time taken to see and be seen is worth the effort.  Lovers need to learn to read each other.  This comes in three stages:  Observation, Interpretation and Application.  The first stage in reading is often overlooked.  What I mean is that we often decide what we think about what we have seen without really seeing.  It is good to indulge the sense of sight and look at the one we love.  After really seeing the intimate details our love becomes more special and unique.  For example, if we see our love has hair we have distinguished them from all bald people.  If we see that our love has red hair, we seperate them from blondes and brunettes.  If we see that our love wears a pony-tail, we have distinguished them from all those who have cropped hair or a bob.  God’s love is reflected in his intimate knowledge of the number of hairs on our head.  It emphasizes his knowledge of our uniqueness – we are special.

As the lovers praise each other they interpret how they feel about each thing they see.  They delight in difference.  Finally, the lovers act on what they see.  This usually involves them coming together in a steamy embrace.  All of this started by close and detailed observation.  However, how do people observe each other if we keep ourselves hidden?

Song of Songs 5:9-6:10

⁹ How is your beloved better than others,
   most beautiful of women?
How is your beloved better than others,
   that you so charge us?

   She

 ¹⁰ My beloved is radiant and ruddy,
   outstanding among ten thousand.
¹¹ His head is purest gold;
   his hair is wavy
   and black as a raven.
¹² His eyes are like doves
   by the water streams,
washed in milk,
   mounted like jewels.
¹³ His cheeks are like beds of spice
   yielding perfume.
His lips are like lilies
   dripping with myrrh.
¹⁴ His arms are rods of gold
   set with topaz.
His body is like polished ivory
   decorated with lapis lazuli.
¹⁵ His legs are pillars of marble
   set on bases of pure gold.
His appearance is like Lebanon,
   choice as its cedars.
¹⁶ His mouth is sweetness itself;
   he is altogether lovely.
This is my beloved, this is my friend,
   daughters of Jerusalem.

 ¹ Where has your beloved gone,
   most beautiful of women?
Which way did your beloved turn,
   that we may look for him with you?

   She

 ² My beloved has gone down to his garden,
   to the beds of spices,
to browse in the gardens
   and to gather lilies.
³ I am my beloved’s and my beloved is mine;
   he browses among the lilies.

   He

 ⁴ You are as beautiful as Tirzah, my darling,
   as lovely as Jerusalem,
   as majestic as troops with banners.
⁵ Turn your eyes from me;
   they overwhelm me.
Your hair is like a flock of goats
   descending from Gilead.
⁶ Your teeth are like a flock of sheep
   coming up from the washing.
Each has its twin,
   not one of them is missing.
⁷ Your temples behind your veil
   are like the halves of a pomegranate.
⁸ Sixty queens there may be,
   and eighty concubines,
   and virgins beyond number;
⁹ but my dove, my perfect one, is unique,
   the only daughter of her mother,
   the favorite of the one who bore her.
The young women saw her and called her blessed;
   the queens and concubines praised her.

   Friends

 ¹⁰ Who is this that appears like the dawn,
   fair as the moon, bright as the sun,
   majestic as the stars in procession?

Questions

1. What physical features do the lovers draw attention to?
2. Why do lovers need to take time to praise physical features?
3. Why are some of the romantic observations merely repeated from previous chapters?
4. How detailed are your observations of those that you love?
5. What do games like Mr and Mrs. show about how little we observe each other?

The female in Song of Songs has an anxiety dream.  These are dreams in which one fears a future event or circumstance and works through the possibilities of its happening.  The dreamer is barred from fulfilling their wishes by something beyond their control and they can only escape by waking.  My wife has these kind of dreams frequently.  In her dreams, there is usually a production or performance and my wife is unprepared and anxious.  This leads to her waking in the middle of the night and then scurrelously completing forms and completing work to make sure nothing is left to chance.  Of course, we can see easily the relationship between such dreams and desire for control.  We are meant to have dominion over what is truly ours, but we do not have dominion for things that exist outside of our borders.  Unfortunately love brings us into close proximity with someone over whom we may have influence, but we should lack control.  Imagine the absurdity of the lover saying to the beloved, “You must love me!”  Because of our desires and our dreams being unmet we experience pain and loss, evenin the arms of the ones we love.  It is good to enter into frequent dialog to try and soften the pain and to meet each others’ expectaions sacrificially and joyfully, but even then not every desire or every attempt to connect can be fulfilled.

Men and women are made differently.  What may satisfy one or excite one may not interest the other.  Of course, the ultimate love is shown as we learn to joyfully sacrifice our own wants and desires to meet the desires and wants of our beloved.  Of course, this involves intimate communication and will lead to affirmation within the relationship.  It seems to be beyond many wannabe lovers.

In the dream of Song of Songs 5:2-8, the woman is comfortable in her chambers and has retired for the night.  Being awoken by an aroused lover seems to be too much trouble for her.  He is obviously disappointed in his efforts and withdraws.  When she is more fully awake she realises what a mistake she has made.  Her wishes to be intimate with her lover have been dashed by her own sleepiness and reluctance to prepare herself for him.  The thought of losing him drives her out into the night and into danger – in fact her subconscious leaves her wounded physically and emotionally for not grasping at the chance for sexual intimacy when it arose.  She ends with a sad plea that whoever does find her elusive lover should tell him how overcome with love she is for him.

Her greatest fear is losing her lover.  Her greatest fear is being the very cause for his leaving her and so she works against this by employing all her charms and exhausting all her efforts.  Her lack of control brings anxiety, but love must sacrifice control.  The only control we are encouraged to have is over subordinates or over the self.  Any other control is an illusion and it kills love. 

Fears from our past come into our present and prevent us from loosening up and relaxing.  We are afraid what will happen when we give ourselves over.  We are afraid what will happen if we hold nothing back.  we are afraid to trust.  But in as much as love does not not trust and fights for control is the measure of how our love is deficient.  It will always be a struggle – but when we engage with the pain of truly giving ourselves away, we are able to rest in the arms of the one we love even though our sleep may be troubled.

Song of Songs 5:2-8

² I slept but my heart was awake.
   Listen! My beloved is knocking:
“Open to me, my sister, my darling,
   my dove, my flawless one.
My head is drenched with dew,
   my hair with the dampness of the night.”
³ I have taken off my robe—
   must I put it on again?
I have washed my feet—
   must I soil them again?
⁴ My beloved thrust his hand through the latch-opening;
   my heart began to pound for him.
⁵ I arose to open for my beloved,
   and my hands dripped with myrrh,
my fingers with flowing myrrh,
   on the handles of the bolt.
⁶ I opened for my beloved,
   but my beloved had left; he was gone.
   My heart sank at his departure.^[a]
I looked for him but did not find him.
   I called him but he did not answer.
⁷ The watchmen found me
   as they made their rounds in the city.
They beat me, they bruised me;
   they took away my cloak,
   those watchmen of the walls!
⁸ Daughters of Jerusalem, I charge you—
   if you find my beloved,
what will you tell him?
   Tell him I am faint with love.

Questions

1. How do we know this is a anxiety dream sequence?
2. What does the dreamer wish for?
3. What prevents the dreamer from getting what she wants?
4. What do you wish for in each of your significant relationships?
5. How do your physical limitations, your lack of desire, or life’s distractions lead you away from your desire?
6. When do you go to God to help him strengthen you in your primary relationship with him and your secondary relationship with others?

Going Deeper

Meditate on the following truths:

• “You are in Christ.  He has died and been raised, therefore, you have died and been raised, therfore sin has no right to hold any sway over you.  So don’t let sin make you obey its desires.”
• “You were washed, you were sanctified, you were justified, in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.”  1 Corinthians 6:11
• You belong to the Risen Christ.

Against ‘Settling Down’ (Iain Provan)

Eros calls us to affirmation, but it also calls us to respect.  The most noticeable feature of 4:1-5:1, after the strong implication of female powerlessness in 3:6-11, is the way in which the man goes out of his way to emphasize that the woman is a person in her own right with boundaries that must be respected.  He may be her intimate, but he is only by invitation.  He does not own her, nor can he control her.  If he is to enjoy her, it must be at her summons.  Throughout our passage there is a recognition, in other words, that even though the couple remain in a marital relationship, each remains as “other” to the one who loves.  There is, consequently, much wooing in the passage.  The man accepts that the relationship can only be good if it is mutual, and he pursues his beloved with passion.  He recognises his beloved as a person before he regards her as a woman.

There is an enduring message here, too, for those who are married.  It is an all-too-common root of marital trouble that one or both parties “settle down” in a marriage and begin to take the other person for granted.  The legal contracts are signed, and all wooing in due course ceases.  Too often there is in fact no ongoing sense of the other at all – a separate and unique person with whom it is an enormous privilege to spend one’s life.  The transgressions of boundaries and the invasion of space become legion, and ownership and control become the governing  categories of the marriage.  sexual interaction, which can only ever express what is already there in the relationship, becomes humdrum and predictable and is no longer about the union of two free spirits but about the slow expiration of two souls in bondage.

Eros calls us (back) to the constant recognition of the other – the one who befriends us not because he or she has no choice but out of self-giving and committed love.  It calls us to make wooing an ongoing feature of our marriages, not just a prelude to them.  Eros thus constantly pushes beyond the legal institution of marriage to the hear of it, insisting that what is respectable is not necessarily good and that what has been accepted as normal is not necessarily to be accepted as what is right.

Eros calls us, finally, to intimacy.  the natural and good end of affirmation and wooing is unrestrained and joyous sexual, emotional, and spiritual intimacy.  The woman in 4:1-5:1 welcomes her lover with open arms into her garden, and he comes to feast.

Song of Songs 4:1-5:1

¹ Behold, ^(A)you are beautiful, my love,
   behold, you are beautiful!
^(B)Your eyes are doves
   ^(C)behind your veil.
^(D)Your hair is like a flock of goats
   leaping down ^(E)the slopes of Gilead.
² Your ^(F)teeth are like a flock of shorn ewes
   that have come up from the washing,
all of which bear twins,
   and not one among them has lost its young.
³ Your lips are like ^(G)a scarlet thread,
   and your mouth is ^(H)lovely.
Your ^(I)cheeks are like halves of a pomegranate
   ^(J)behind your veil.
⁴ Your ^(K)neck is like the tower of David,
   built in ^(L)rows of stone;^[a]
on it ^(M)hang a thousand shields,
   all of ^(N)them shields of warriors.
⁵ Your ^(O)two breasts are like two ^(P)fawns,
   twins of a gazelle,
   that ^(Q)graze among the lilies.
^{6 (R)}Until the day breathes
   and the shadows flee,
I will go away to the mountain of ^(S)myrrh
   and the hill of ^(T)frankincense.
^{7 (U)}You are altogether beautiful, my love;
   there is no ^(V)flaw in you.
^{8 (W)}Come with me from ^(X)Lebanon, my ^(Y)bride;
   come with me from ^(Z)Lebanon.
Depart^[b] from the peak of Amana,
   from the peak of ^(AA)Senir and ^(AB)Hermon,
from the dens of lions,
   from the mountains of leopards.

 ⁹ You have captivated my heart, my ^(AC)sister, my bride;
   you have captivated my heart with one glance of your eyes,
   with one ^(AD)jewel of your necklace.
¹⁰ How beautiful is your love, my ^(AE)sister, my bride!
   How much ^(AF)better is your love than wine,
   and ^(AG)the fragrance of your oils than any spice!
¹¹ Your ^(AH)lips drip nectar, my bride;
   ^(AI)honey and milk are under your tongue;
   the fragrance of your garments is ^(AJ)like the fragrance of ^(AK)Lebanon.
¹² A garden locked is my ^(AL)sister, my bride,
   a spring locked, ^(AM)a fountain ^(AN)sealed.
¹³ Your shoots are ^(AO)an orchard of pomegranates
   with all ^(AP)choicest fruits,
   ^(AQ)henna with ^(AR)nard,
¹⁴ nard and saffron, ^(AS)calamus and ^(AT)cinnamon,
   with all trees of ^(AU)frankincense,
^(AV)myrrh and ^(AW)aloes,
   with all ^(AX)choice spices—
¹⁵ a garden fountain, a well of ^(AY)living water,
   and flowing streams from ^(AZ)Lebanon.

 ¹⁶ Awake, O north wind,
   and come, O south wind!
Blow upon my ^(BA)garden,
   let its spices flow.

   ^(BB)Let my beloved come to his ^(BC)garden,
   and eat its ^(BD)choicest fruits.

¹ I ^(A)came to my garden, my ^(B)sister, my bride,
   I gathered my ^(C)myrrh with my spice,
   I ate my ^(D)honeycomb with my honey,
   I ^(E)drank my wine with my milk.

Questions

1. How is the woman’s free will to withold her ‘garden’ affirmed?
2. How is the willing surrender of her ‘garden’ emphasized?
3. How is the love in this passage contrasted with the ‘lovemaking’ on the bed of Solomon?
4. Can a man and woman be prevented from marrying by force but secretly be married?
5. How can praise and conversation be more central to your lovemaking?

The latter part of chapter 3 has Solomon rising up in a barren, loveless backdrop of imagery.  The NIV makes assumptions about Solomon and presents him as though he was approaching in majesty.  For example the first word in verse six can be translated as who or what.  Making the translation who implies a fragrant man and so a heroic lover might come into view.  However, if what is used we can see that the smoke is the fragrant smoke of sacrifices that have been offered on the bed of Solomon that follows.  Note that the bed is in the desert which is contrasted with the fertile lush imagery of the woman and her lover.  Note how the warriors are prepared for the terrors of the night.  This would imply that they are there to keep Solomon’s love conquests from escaping the bed rather than to protect Solomon.    Finally, verse 11 would be ironic.  Solomon must have had many weddings that his mother crowned him during.

The whole section is of male conquest of women.  Solomon represents those who, with wealth and opulance overwhelm a woman and drag her away from true love and intimacy.  Men today promice wealth and security rather than relationship.  Men today still wield power and trafiic sex-slaves across borders without intimacy.  Men who dominate women have the physical act of sex, but like Solomon it is barren, empty, and false.

Men need to treasure and nurture a woman.  The design has been one woman with one man, but men become greedy for lovers when they find intimacy difficult.  It is as though quantity will substitute for quality.

Song of Songs 3:6-11

 ^{6 (N)}What is that coming up from the wilderness
   like ^(O)columns of smoke,
perfumed with ^(P)myrrh and frankincense,
   with all the fragrant powders of a merchant?
⁷ Behold, it is the litter^[a] of Solomon!
Around it are ^(Q)sixty ^(R)mighty men,
   some of the mighty men of Israel,
⁸ all of them wearing swords
   and expert in war,
each with his ^(S)sword at his thigh,
   against ^(T)terror by night.
⁹ King Solomon made himself a carriage^[b]
   from the wood of Lebanon.
¹⁰ He made its posts of silver,
   its back of gold, its seat of purple;
its interior was inlaid with love
   by ^(U)the daughters of Jerusalem.
¹¹ Go out, O ^(V)daughters of Zion,
   and look upon King Solomon,
with the crown with which his mother crowned him
   on ^(W)the day of his wedding,
   on the day of the gladness of his heart.

Questions

1. Do you think Solomon is being praised of vilified as a lover in this passage?
2. How is the metaphor of conquest developed by using images of sacrifice, and representing Solomon’s bed as a chariot/throne/altar?
3. How is Solomon’s bed existing in a desert significant?
4. How do we promote a vision of sexual conquest for males?
5. Why are women showing signs of stress and anxiety in the modern trend of living together and men are loving it?

The first five verses of Song of Songs 3 involve an erotic dream that the woman of the song has about her lover.  It is to be contrasted with the latter half of the chapter where Solomon uses his power to dominate women.  In her dream the woman has a longing to be secure in the arms of the one she loves.  The emphasis on security is shown in the dream sequence when she brings her lover home to the house where she grew up and takes him to the bedroom where her mother conceived her.  Her heart is consumed with love and she wants to offer herself up to her lover because of the power of the love that has come at its proper time.

This willing sacrifice is in contrast with the forced sacrifice of the bed of Solomon which we will look at tomorrow.

Adults long for each other and desire to be with each other physically in ways that are healthy.  It is good for a wife to let herself dream of and long for her husband’s sexual embrace.  In various cultures and communities the sexuality of the woman has been oppressed.  In Afghanistan female circumcision would mutilate a woman so that she could experience very little pleasure from sex.  In our own culture men often use defenceless young girls for sexual gratification and so create fear and disgust in the mind of the girl about sex when they become a woman.  In some cases a woman might play at sex using it as power herself because she has seen that she is able to get the things that she wants through sexually dominance.  The godly way is to wait until love arises naturally and for a wife to desire her husband in a total way.  This means that when she is alone she will think of the intimacy that comes through conversation and sexual union.  If there is a blockage of this desire it needs to be looked at.  Maybe a woman has lost interest because she feels abandoned.  Maybe a woman loses interest because she fills her life with other things that demand her time and energy.  Maybe a woman got married for the wrong reasons and after the wedding the lack of attraction for their spouse is apparent.  In each case, knowing that the Lord hates divorce, the woman needs to seek Christ.  Christ approves of the intimacy that should fill the dreams of a love-sick woman and he will lead on a path to healing.

NB:  The passage focuses on the woman and so the reflection is mostly concerning women.  The next section will focus on men.

Song of Songs 3:1-5

 ¹ On my bed ^(A)by night
I sought ^(B)him whom my soul loves;
   ^(C)I sought him, but found him not.
² I will rise now and go about the city,
   in ^(D)the streets and in the squares;
I will seek ^(E)him whom my soul loves.
   I sought him, but found him not.
^{3 (F)}The watchmen found me
   as they went about in the city.
“Have you seen him whom my soul loves?”
⁴ Scarcely had I passed them
   when I found ^(G)him whom my soul loves.
I ^(H)held him, and would not let him go
   until I had ^(I)brought him into my mother’s house,
   and into the chamber of ^(J)her who conceived me.
^{5 (K)}I adjure you, ^(L)O daughters of Jerusalem,
   ^(M)by the gazelles or the does of the field,
that you not stir up or awaken love
   until it pleases.

Questions

1. Where was the woman when she searched for the one her heart loves?
2. In her dream, where does she take the man?
3. Why, in your opinion, does the dream emphasize a woman taking sexual initiative in her dreams?
4. How can a young woman avoid inappropriate sexual desires until love is aroused at the right time?
5. How can each sex take initiative in sexual union WITHOUT making demands or being oppressive?

The man entices the woman to leave her sanctuary with other women and come out into the open with him.  He promises protection from men who might want to do her harm, but most of all he promises her adventure and sexual pleasure.  She agrees to come out into the unprotected open with him and once more the couple are locked in a sexual embrace.  From dusk ’til dawn he covers her body with kisses.

The man in this passage is creative and takes initiative.  He promises a life of passion and adventure and he delivers.  The woman trusts him and surrenders to his plan.  As a model of God and his subjects it shows how our submission and trust should be as we follow God into a passionate adventure.  God’s passionate adventure includes inspiring a man to lead a woman in the ways described in Song of Songs.  It also involves women submitting to a man’s caring initiative and finding comfort there.

Song of Songs 2:14-17

¹⁴ My dove in the clefts of the rock,    in the hiding places on the mountainside, show me your face,    let me hear your voice; for your voice is sweet,    and your face is lovely. ¹⁵Catch for us the foxes,    the little foxes that ruin the vineyards,    our vineyards that are in bloom.

   She

¹⁶ My beloved is mine and I am his;    he browses among the lilies. ¹⁷ Until the day breaks    and the shadows flee, turn, my beloved,    and be like a gazelle or like a young stag    on the rugged hills.^[d]

Questions

1. If ‘dove’ often refers to deity, how does the man view the woman?
2. What emphasizes the exclusive nature of the love in the passage?
3. What might be possible interpretations of ‘browsing among the lilies’?
4. How might a man take initiative in leading his wife on an adventure?
5. How does a woman assist or resist the passionate leadership of a man?  What are the consequences of each choice?

Physical strength and prowess are not essential for love, but they are to be admired.  The woman in Song of Songs compares her lover to a gazelle.  In other words her lover is sure footed and swift in the coutryside.  He has strength, stamina, and possibly suppleness.  Men today focus a lot of their exercise on strength.  It is good to break down training into the three different areas of fitness labeled above.  Strength can be enhanced by resistance training.  This includes lifting weights and pulling against elastic resistance bands.  Stamina can be enhanced by aerobic and anarobic exercise.  This includes running walking and high reps on weight machines with low resistance.  Finally, suppleness can be improved by stretches in exercises like pilates and gymnastics. Time spent making time for these exercises will increase a general sense of well-being but also help the sex-life.

Song of Songs 2:8-13

 ⁸ Listen! My beloved!
   Look! Here he comes,
leaping across the mountains,
   bounding over the hills.
⁹ My beloved is like a gazelle or a young stag.
   Look! There he stands behind our wall,
gazing through the windows,
   peering through the lattice.
¹⁰ My beloved spoke and said to me,
   “Arise, my darling,
   my beautiful one, come with me.
¹¹ See! The winter is past;
   the rains are over and gone.
¹² Flowers appear on the earth;
   the season of singing has come,
the cooing of doves
   is heard in our land.
¹³ The fig tree forms its early fruit;
   the blossoming vines spread their fragrance.
Arise, come, my darling;
   my beautiful one, come with me.”

Questions

1. In what ways is the man’s physical prowes emphasized?
2. What does the man want from the woman?
3. Why do you think the woman might be hesitant?
4. How could you praise the physical fitness of your lover?
5. Make a plan for physical fitness that will enhance your love life.

The woman in Song of Songs attests that her lover is also unique.  He provides her with protection and pleasure.  The protection is highlighted through the mention of shade and a banner that cover her.  Protection from the sun comes from shade and protection from harmful people comes from the banner.  The banner is interesting because, although it is a sign that marks the banquet site, it is a military term for a war banner.  The protection over the woman and the sign that marks the location of pleasure is ‘love’.  This love leaves the woman weakened but craving more.  The man is a source of strength for the woman which nourishes her.  He enfolds her in a protective and intimate embrace.  Once more the nuance is in lovemaking, but whilst in the act she feels both her own weakness and her lover’s strength.  She feels both pleasure and protection.

Finally in these verses the woman says not to awaken or force love.  Love should be allowed to happen with the right person in the right way at the right time.  When the affects are so intoxicating and powerful love should be waited for with breathless anticipation.

Notice that the woman is glorying in what ‘is’ and not what ‘should be’.  She is not making demands and witholding her affections until those demands are met.  She chooses to sing of and meditate on the positive and is carried along by her strong, erotic desires.

Men should learn from this passage to be a safe place that protects and brings pleasure.  Women should learn to relinquish control and allow themselves to feel safety and pleasure in the embrace of their man.

Song of Songs 2:1-7

¹ I am a rose^[a]of Sharon,

   a lily of the valleys.

² As a lily among brambles,   

so is

my love among the young women.

³ As an apple tree among the trees of the forest,   

so is my beloved among the young men.

With great delight I sat in his shadow,   

and his fruit was sweet to my taste.

⁴ He brought me to the banqueting house,^[b]   

and his banner over me was love.

⁵ Sustain me with raisins;   

refresh me with apples,   

for I am sick with love.

⁶ His left hand is under my head,   

and his right hand embraces me!

⁷ I adjure you,^[c] O daughters of Jerusalem,   

by the gazelles or the does of the field,

that you not stir up or awaken love

until it pleases.

Questions

1. What do both shade and a banner provide?
2. What do apples and raisins provide?
3. Should a woman look to a man for protection?
4. How do people force love rather than allowing God’s timing?
5. How can you build up a man by praising his sweetness and protection?

Going Deeper

Raisin cakes and apples were thought to be aphrodisiacs.    Some sources list foods which we today think of as aphrodisiacs.  Think about adding the following to your shopping list:

1. Hot chilis
2. Aspragus/Avacados
3. Bananas
4. Chocolate
5. Oysters
6. Pomegranites
7. Red wine
8. Salmon or Walnuts
9. Vanilla
10. Watermellon

Do some research on aphrodisiacs and add them to your shopping list if you are married.