Psalm of Complaint

God, hear my cry;
Father, hear my complaint

I am overwhelmed and desperate
Injustice seems ready to overpower us
We have followed well meaning advice
We have been walking the road to parenthood
You sent us word of a child in need
We answered the call
Two messages arrived from different sources
We responded in trust
We carefully considered whether we should be involved
Disengagement would have protected our hearts
But we committed the way to you
That you would make straight our path
We wondered at your fingerprints
We marveled that a former student oversaw the case
We rested in your provision
Inertia took us through open doors
In the presence of the judge you granted us favour
On my birthday you gave us a gift

Now we receive a message that crushes my bones
Now a call weakens my limbs
I do not know how to be strong
Fortitude is far from me
A contract must be honoured
And a dream once more removed

Am I punished for my past iniquity
Does time long gone leave our house deserted
Is it grace for me to bow my head in sorrow
But to lift it to your presence
I can not escape you
Your presence encompasses reality
I must be at peace with you
Fears war in my aching chest

To never be a father
Will they take him from me
To never be a mother
Are these two weeks our only taste

God, you are holy
Your holiness weighs heavy on me
God you are righteous
My shameful state leaves me without recourse
I ask for mercy
I wish to be a father to this child
I plead for grace
Let my wife hold him close

I am an agent of shalom
You will bring calm
In the heart of suffering maturity awakes
I am a servant of the most high
You have brought reconciliation
Let my mind reflect on those riches

Oh, God, my hope is in you.
Be my comfort.
Oh, God, mighty citadel
Protect your children.





About Plymothian

I teach at Moody Bible Institute in Chicago. My interests include education, biblical studies, and spiritual formation. I have been married to Kelli since 1998 and we have two children, Daryl and Amelia. For recreation I like to run, play soccer, play board games, read and travel.
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1 Response to Psalm of Complaint

  1. hrlmercygirl says:

    we are really praying for you guys.  thanks for sharing your heart.

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